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One /
Swap out tonic for seltzer in your gin or vodka drink (especially if you’re going to have nine of them.) You’ll save more than 100 calories per cocktail and get hydrated and buzzed at the same time.

Two /
Don’t starve yourself all week to squeeze into that little black dress and then go hog-wild on the passed fried appetizers at the party. Eat balanced, healthy meals and exercise every day the week before so that you can show up at the party feeling like a hot chick.

Three /
If you order a tiny salad on a date with the dressing on the side, pick off the croutons and ignore the breadbasket, then you are not eating like a hot chick. Your date’s not stupid (at least, we hope not), and he knows that you’re going to speed to the Taco Bell drive-thru as soon as the date is over. Save yourself from their mystery meat and dive into a juicy steak at dinner. Your date will think you’re even hotter than the molten chocolate cake.

Four /
The only circumstance in which we will condone fast food is when you’ve been up all night partying and it’s 4 a.m. We’re pretty sure that eating a bunch of toxins soaks up the toxins from the alcohol and they end up cancelling each other out.

Five /
Sweets will only create a giant muffin top when you deprive yourself of them for weeks, believe that carbs are the devil’s work and then break down and eat an entire pastry platter during a weak, stressed, PMS moment. The day you stop seeing a cookie as a scary thing is the day you’ll start losing weight and loving your body.

Six /
Unless you are a frat boy or a linebacker (or both), please don’t drink like one. We know it can be tempting to spend all day Sunday drinking bottomless pitchers at a sports bar, but that will only leave you feeling puffy and bloated in a bigger-sized dress at your next holiday shindig. Stick to light beers, wine and low-calorie cocktails.

Seven /
Yes, last night’s leftover chocolate cake does make a perfectly acceptable breakfast — as long as you balance it out later with a giant spinach salad for dinner.

Eight /
No matter how super important that event coming up is, don’t try some sort of Gwyneth Paltrow cleanse. Instead, avoid processed and sugary foods for one week and fill up on apples, almonds, oatmeal, eggs, spinach, fish and every vegetable, fruit and protein that our Mother Earth gave us.

Nine /
Make food fun again by not thinking about the calories and oily fat content in that delicious slice of piping hot pepperoni pizza. Enjoy it with the confidence that you are a hot chick who deserves to feed her body without guilt.

Jodi Lipper and Cerina Vincent are the authors of How to Eat Like a Hot Chick, $14 (Harper Paperbacks)

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